Most of my posts in the last few months have been about my pregnancy. I tried not to become pregnancy obsessed on the blog, but it has been hard because I am really, really happy. However, I still want to acknowledge the pain of infertility, not only for myself but for the many, many couples continuing to struggle in their journey toward becoming parents.
As such, I posted more openly than ever before about infertility on facebook. Along with this picture (which I have posted on the blog before):
I wrote the following: It’s Canadian Infertility Awareness Week. Infertility is a medical condition that affects 1 in 6 couples for a variety of reasons and it affects people of all ages. As someone who struggled with infertility, I wholeheartedly believe the research that shows that the stress of it is akin to being told you have a terminal illness or the death of a loved one. Even though I’m pregnant, I still have Diminished Ovarian Reserve and may never be able to get pregnant again. I consider myself extremely lucky and want to honor the others who are still trying.
Several people “liked” my post and one wrote a kind message. I decided to divulge more information in response. Here’s what I wrote: Thanks X (and everyone else who liked the status). We got very lucky and got pregnant naturally while on the wait list for IVF. Infertility is often treated like a taboo, hidden topic, but it’s more common than most people realize. For those going through it, it is often emotionally, physically, and financially draining. I know I really benefited from support from friends and strangers alike, so I want to acknowledge our struggle to conceive and the grief we experienced so as to take a step toward making this a more open topic and to support others if I can.
I hope that if anyone on my facebook is dealing with infertility now or in the future, they’ll feel comfortable contacting me to ask questions, share experiences, or just vent. As happy as I am now, I know that my infertility didn’t magically go away and I remember the grief that I experienced. It doesn’t take away from my feelings now and I don’t feel like I was robbed of all the time we spent trying, but it needs to be remembered and acknowledged.